Sexual Hook Ups Damned By Chastity Groups, Hailed By New Feminists
source: http://www.abcnews.go.com/Health/sexual-hook-ups-damned-chastity-groups-hailed-feminists/sto...
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- hpseaton
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So wrote Tom Wolfe in his 2000 book "Hooking Up" -- a term that describes a wide range of coupling from making out to intercourse.
For more than a decade, the "hookup" has been an integral part of the American college experience -- a result of the increased permissiveness that came with the sexual revolution of the 1970s.
Just recently at Harvard University -- sometimes pegged as "godless and liberal" -- the hookup culture came under fire, mostly from a small but growing abstinence group called True Love Revolution.
They argue that women who invoke a new kind of feminism -- the right to have sex whenever and with whomever they choose -- is demeaning to women.
"A popular thing to say among this intellectual crowd, in the ivies and in feminism in general, is to say that sex is empowering and a real woman uses her sexuality in any way she pleases," said Rachel Wagley, a 20-year-old sociology student who is TLR's co-president. "It's blatantly false and a lie that this culture tells to girls for their own benefit." Silpa Kovvali, a 21-year-old computer science concentrator, argued in a Harvard Crimson editorial that there is nothing "inherently degrading" about engaging in casual sex -- in fact, she said, it can be "empowering."
But chastity groups seem to be on to something -- a growing unease that although hooking up can be liberating, it can also be annoying and sometimes destructive.
"It's a huge part of life here," said Maariya Bajwa, a senior at the University of Florida. "When I used to take the bus I'd hear random people having conversations about random hook ups they had. I was like, 'Uh guys, we're on a bus. I don't need to hear about your one-night stands.'"
By the end of senior year, the average college student has had 6.9 hookups, mostly after a "good bit of drinking," according to a survey of 4,000 students at five universities by Stanford University sociology professor Paula England.
Her work revealed that while 24 percent of the respondents had reported never having hooked up, 28 percent had more than 10 such casual sexual encounters.
England, who set out to explore the dating habits of college students, found they were kissing, having oral sex and sometimes intercourse with "no expectation that either party has an interest in moving toward a relationship."
"There's a lot of degrading treatment of some women and it is empoweringly free for other women," she told ABCNews.com.
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SleepDirt
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What did you say there phone numbers were? A friend was asking.
- 2 years ago
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SleepDirt
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JonRaymond
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Interesting. This might be worth some further research.
- 2 years ago
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JonRaymond
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Matich
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I cannot understand the thought process of randomly hooking up. I have no problem with it, but I really just cannot understand it at all. There is no reason for anyone to be telling people what to do or how to live their lives if they are not harming anyone else, but I think it would be illuminating to hear the motivation behind random hookups. I really think it is just an addiction to the chemical rush one has from sex.
- 2 years ago
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Matich
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EdJoyProductions
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Chastity groups are insane so I don't even vaguely care what their thoughts are on the subject of an act they have never experienced.
My only concern is the danger of sexual activity with a stranger. Oh, I made a rhyme. :D It is not just disease, as if that is not scary enough, it is crazy people of both sexes. You have no idea if the woman or man that you are hooking up with is bat shit insane and will make a complete mess of your life or worse.
It is better to get to know someone before hopping in the sack. Do what you want kids, but consider my warning.
- 2 years ago
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EdJoyProductions
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rwahrens
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EdJoyProductions:
Well said.
Many people just think about the physical aspects of sex, but there are psychological aspects of it too.
Not everybody buys into the casual sex scene, and lots of guys (and probably gals too) are in it to take advantage of the other side, but it is (like you allude) the ones that are prone to get a little sticky and follow you around thinking that cause you screwed them, you must like them, that can be dangerous.
There is also the danger that you can get just so burned out on sex (yes, you can) that it loses meaning, or that you get to where no relationship means anything till you've had sex. Both are damaging to one's mental health and how you can handle future relationships.
After all, it's when you are young that you are forming your relationship skills and setting patterns that will last a lifetime!
I think chastity can be as damaging as the other extreme, but at least it's not gonna give you STDs. Nothing wrong with it, unless it is accompanied with religious delusions that it is some kind of magical elixir that'll keep you safe till marriage and will make that marriage perfect.
- 2 years ago
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rwahrens
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remanns
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"FAST(n cheap) Fraking cult".
If YOUR one of "those",... making notches,... on the ,....whatever it is you notch,.... one of "THOSE" of either sex,....I (at least) do not want to know you. Even if I wouldn't do you,....because your my gender and same sexual pref.,.......I don't want to know you.
Sex is not "Burger King" -"1,000,000 Sold". Damn,....really,....I can cook for myself. Its demeaning to the dignity of the soul and virtue and vision of hairless monkeys of all ages throughout the ages,........doing their best to pull themselves upward from base origins throughout history.p.s. Ive known those of you "I WOULD do", that have THAT value system,.... far tooooo well,........... for FAR too long.
- 2 years ago
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remanns
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remanns
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............just, try not to get to attached. If your a "slut male",....hell, this should work for you. ( just know that them fems jus playin,........(if not "on purpose" playin you)! You got the soul of a romantic,...............DUCK! ( and hold the ground dearly)
- 2 years ago
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remanns
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Varex_Sythe
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It's a personal choice. You're in college, you're adults, you make your own choices and live with the consequences. If you like having one night stands and think it's worth the risk, then more power to you. If you want to say abstinent until marriage, then I congratulate you on your dedication. If you fit anywhere in between, then that's awesome too.
- 2 years ago
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Varex_Sythe
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Lydster
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Varex_Sythe:
I think waiting till marriage has nothing to do with love, simply because marriage doesn't neccessarily have anything to do with love either. It's just sticking to a dogma, but dogmas do not have to be correct. Marriage is for me just a random event in a relationship. It might as well be the first anniversary or some other point. But that doesn't have to mean you trust your partner more that before and you're "ready" for it now.
I'm not surprised that especially these people have such a high divorce rate if they really think that getting married makes them live happily ever after. It's just another one of these "easy religious solutions" that prevents people from using their brain and making up their mind.
- 2 years ago
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Lydster
