For Better or Worse, 'Sister-Swapping' Persists
source: http://womensenews.org/story/marriagedivorcemotherhood/100319/better-or-worse-sister-swappin...
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Berdel--also known as sister swapping and parallel weddings--is dwindling but still practiced. One woman says the tribal custom, which is controlled by a male elder, may have led to her wedding, but it's not what she wants for her daughters.
Bozan said his love is unconditional but the marriage is conditional.
That's because of the special rules of their wedding, conducted according to the ancient tradition of berdel, also known as parallel brides or sister swapping, in which the daughters of two families marry the sons of the other in the same ceremony.
On a dusty summer day, 23 years ago, Bozan wed Sultan and Sultan's brother married Bozan's sister.
The practice is intended to solidify inter-family bonds, but also allow for a possible parting of ways.
By custom, if one marriage breaks, so must the other.
It is not clear how many marriages have been sealed through berdel. But scholars say one thing is clear--berdel marriage is not about two individuals, it is about two families, about tribes and kinship. It firmly positions the head of the family, the father or the grandfather, as the decision maker. He cuts the deals. He can annul marriages. No one asks the women.
Find out more about this Women's eNews story at http://womensenews.org/story/marriagedivorcemotherhood/100319/better-or-worse-si...
Bozan said his love is unconditional but the marriage is conditional.
That's because of the special rules of their wedding, conducted according to the ancient tradition of berdel, also known as parallel brides or sister swapping, in which the daughters of two families marry the sons of the other in the same ceremony.
On a dusty summer day, 23 years ago, Bozan wed Sultan and Sultan's brother married Bozan's sister.
The practice is intended to solidify inter-family bonds, but also allow for a possible parting of ways.
By custom, if one marriage breaks, so must the other.
It is not clear how many marriages have been sealed through berdel. But scholars say one thing is clear--berdel marriage is not about two individuals, it is about two families, about tribes and kinship. It firmly positions the head of the family, the father or the grandfather, as the decision maker. He cuts the deals. He can annul marriages. No one asks the women.
Find out more about this Women's eNews story at http://womensenews.org/story/marriagedivorcemotherhood/100319/better-or-worse-si...
