For Gays, Entering Seniors Home Can Mean Going Back in Closet
source: http://thetyee.ca/News/2012/12/31/Dignity-House/?utm_source=mondayheadlines&utm_medium=email...
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- Hardytoo
- added this
http://thetyee.ca/News/2012/12/31/Dignity-House/?utm_source=mondayhea...
By Jeremy J. Nuttall, Today, TheTyee.caDignity House aims to model an alternative: retirement living for LGBT community.
Alex Sangha envisions place where lesbian, gay, bisexual, two-spirited and transgendered people can retire together without fear of bullying by other seniors.
Growing old can be daunting enough, but can be made even more worrisome for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, two-spirited and transgendered community.
Often, checking into a retirement home can be like taking a time machine back to the days when homosexuals were underground and didn't risk letting people know about their sexuality.
To be accepted and to escape bullying from other rest home residents or even staff, many elderly homosexuals simply choose to go back into the closet.
But Alex Sangha says it doesn't have to be that way.
As part of a Master's in Social Work at Dalhousie University (Canada), B.C. resident Sangha has undertaken an initiative to open a rest home catering to the LGBT community and its allies.
"We want to welcome everyone, but we want to create homophobic/transphobic-free place for everyone," said Sangha.
Since he first announced the project and received some media coverage in September he has managed to raise more than $37,000 -- $12,000 more than his original target -- and has received individual donations from across the continent.
The largest portions of the donations came from the United Way and the Vancity Community Foundation, but it hasn't just been the money that's rolling in, said Sangha.
"We have put out a call for applications to set up a dignity house advisory committee," he said recently. "We wanted up to 10 community members, but we already have 17 people, including the four on the committee who have applied."
The committee eventually came to hold 22 members who will get started on the project in late January.
Now the next step is to conduct a study on the feasibility of the project, with the ultimate goal to open the "Dignity House" seniors' home.
Dignity through segregation?
The project has received some criticism from the public with some people alleging a rest home for a particular community amounts to segregation.
UBC professor of social work Brian O'Neill said that's not the case and such a home is needed for LGBT seniors who feel forced to live in isolation or deal with bigotry if they were openly gay at their rest homes.
"I've been out since I was 20," said O'Neill, who is gay himself. "I don't want to have to go back into the closet if I had to go into a long-term care facility."
Though he said he wouldn't have a problem with going to a traditional rest home, he understands how many could object to it.
"The bit of research that I've done around this… is that these institutions have been basically and still are largely organized on the assumption that everybody is heterosexual," he said.
The dynamic can make LGBT seniors feel out of place or even unwanted.
A place to feel safe
That feeling of being out of place has led to high rates of depression in the elderly LGBT community said Catherine Kohm of the Haro Park Centre, a care campus for the elderly in the West End.
"We hear a lot about bullying in the younger population, but I think it's any generation," said Kohm, explaining what LGBT people can face in rest homes.
She said her facility has become an eclectic one as many elderly LGBT people live in the West End, but pointed out there are also immigrants and other marginalized groups living at the centre without conflict.
Kohm said she has one female resident who dresses in men's clothes and goes by a man's name because she feels comfortable enough to live openly at the centre.
It's that kind of openness Sangha said he wants to foster -- rejecting any accusations the home will segregate LGBT people from the rest of the community.
"People say 'that's discrimination, that's segregation, why are they so special?'" said Sangha.
"There is affordable housing for every demographic under the sun," Sangha continues. "Gay and lesbian people are one of the most discriminated groups in society. If anyone ever needed a special place for them so they can live and be safe and live in dignity, it is gays and lesbians."
Sangha said the project will start small, but hopes to have resources to accommodate 50 to 75 people to start, depending on the feasibility study. He said he's already received a phone call from a woman wanting to apply to live in the facility, but he had to explain it hasn't been built yet.
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- LGBT, Housing, Living, health care news, 1 more
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Leen61
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This is sad and it shouldn't be this way, but I'm all for what Dignity House is doing. The problem is that most people from that age group are very homophobic, even more so than the general population.
- 5 months ago
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Leen61
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Catmommy
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When my mother was in a nursing home, one of the aides was a transgender male. Nobody seemed to pay that much attention, not even the residents. He was a nice guy who loved helping the elderly. I guess that trumped the fact that he didn't look or dress like everyone else. Here's to the day when actions speak louder than a dress code in every situation.
- 5 months ago
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Catmommy
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artemis6
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Too bad they feel like that ... awful .
- 5 months ago
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artemis6
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bailey78
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Maybe time to invest in gay retirement homes. Anyone feel like rolling some dice on a home for Old Gay Folks ??
- 5 months ago
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bailey78
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cmc101
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bailey78:
sound good to me
- 5 months ago
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cmc101
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attilatheblond
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Tweeted your link about this to Crooks&Liars and will post about it in their open forum tonight to give it some legs. We SO need this sort of thing in the US too. So much more humane to elders.
- 5 months ago
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attilatheblond
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Hardytoo
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attilatheblond:
FANTASTIC!! Thanks for that.
I'd like to see and hear what others think, and sharing it is just the way to do that.
Will check in there tonite, and tomorrow - to see what the "reaction" is. Pretty sure it'll be mostly positive, as it is here in Vancouver - we have a VERY active culturally-diverse population; it's a wonderful place to live. - 5 months ago
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Hardytoo
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attilatheblond
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Hardytoo:
Sent you link to Americablog too. They cover a lot of LGBT issues too.
- 5 months ago
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attilatheblond
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Hardytoo
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attilatheblond:
Excellent. I hope it draws the attention that it so deserves.
TYVM - 5 months ago
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Hardytoo
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attilatheblond
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What a fantastic project! Blessings upon the project, all who work for making it reality, and especially Alex Sangha. May he live long and may those who work for these goals prosper.
Thanks for posting this, Hardy. Made my New Year's Eve. Yes, the world CAN and WILL be made better.
- 5 months ago
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attilatheblond
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Hardytoo
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attilatheblond:
Yes, we CAN. And we will, one project at a time if need be.
This project is extremely important for what it represents in our society. I'm just tickled-pink about it. Have worked with many seniors who felt pushed back into the closet; it's time we opened all doors - WITH them, and FOR them. - 5 months ago
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Hardytoo
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Hardytoo
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An idea whose time has come.
- 5 months ago
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Hardytoo
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cmc101
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Hardytoo:
yes it has
- 5 months ago
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cmc101
