Comedy | October 03, 2008 | 15 comments

BREAKING: Bush calls in national marching band to lift U.S. spirits

source: http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/bush_calls_in_national?utm_source=onion_rss_daily

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WorldPeaceTV
President Bush called the Coalition of Instrumentalists and Minstrels, more commonly known as the national marching band, to active duty Monday in order to boost the nation's low morale with a series of lively, up-tempo brass numbers.

"This is a measure of last resort," Bush said about the decision to bring out the band, whose 7,500-mile route starts in Maine, stretches down the Eastern Seaboard and across the Midwest, and ends in Southern California at the 2015 Rose Bowl.

The band will play a 61,300-hour rendition of "Stars And Stripes Forever" for the entirety of its cross-country march. Bush added, "If the peppy spirit and eye-catching glide step of this band doesn't cheer people up and fix all the bad problems in our nation, I don't know what can." The national marching band was formed in 1942 by President Franklin Delano Roosevelt to take the nation's mind off—and later serve valiantly in—World War II.
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Bush needs to do something to help the average person. Signing the bailout is just ink on paper for printing more paper so that instruments of paper will be honoured...what about us mr bush?
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    News and Politics,   Comedy,   Election 2008,   Money
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    News and Politics,  Current TV,  Humor,  Comedy,  8 more
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15 comments // BREAKING: Bush calls in national marching band to lift U.S. spirits

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