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As a student at the University of Colorado, I live in a tradition dorm. No, I’m afraid there is no Animal House style fraternity for yours truly, but don’t think that my experiences are any less interesting. As a dorm resident it is standard to have a roommate. While setting you up with a complete stranger seems a cruel thing for the school to do, such is the traditional college experience and it is hard for me to regret a thing when I know that I will be talking about mine for a long time.
I hesitate telling my story. For one, it is risky and I still have to live with the dude through May. Beyond that, he is a good guy; he and I are just very, VERY different. For the sake of discretion, Roommate will be known as Duffman in homage to the character from The Simpsons. As you’ll discover, the two are not so different.
I am unsure how far the phrase has spread, but Duffman is a textbook example of a Bro. If you’re unsure of the label, check out urban dictionary or the infamous youtube video Bro Rape. There are many things to talk about, and with the fact that there is no beginning and end to Duffman’s antics, I can only list them in the order they come to my mind:
I first met Duffman on move-in day this Fall. It’s 11am. My family opens my room’s door, carrying computer, bedding, books, and shower caddie, to find Duffman asleep. He rises up, shirtless, to expose his massive chest, large biceps, and a perfect, bronze tan. My mother and sister are seriously impressed. A first impression of Duffman is always what a hot piece of man he is.
The first thing I remember Duffman telling me about himself is that he loves to eat, and to this he does not lie. Three square meals a day he eats plates and plates of food from our dorm’s endless buffet. Between meals he has protein smoothies and pop-tarts. His mother frequently ships him care packages of cookies and other baked treats that last mere days. Every evening he goes to the gym with his muscle powder drink that contains 1000 calories alone. Through his workouts and his metabolism, the guy remains a god among men, with no body fat and deltoids that make Brad Pitt look like Pauly Shore.... read more through link
I hesitate telling my story. For one, it is risky and I still have to live with the dude through May. Beyond that, he is a good guy; he and I are just very, VERY different. For the sake of discretion, Roommate will be known as Duffman in homage to the character from The Simpsons. As you’ll discover, the two are not so different.
I am unsure how far the phrase has spread, but Duffman is a textbook example of a Bro. If you’re unsure of the label, check out urban dictionary or the infamous youtube video Bro Rape. There are many things to talk about, and with the fact that there is no beginning and end to Duffman’s antics, I can only list them in the order they come to my mind:
I first met Duffman on move-in day this Fall. It’s 11am. My family opens my room’s door, carrying computer, bedding, books, and shower caddie, to find Duffman asleep. He rises up, shirtless, to expose his massive chest, large biceps, and a perfect, bronze tan. My mother and sister are seriously impressed. A first impression of Duffman is always what a hot piece of man he is.
The first thing I remember Duffman telling me about himself is that he loves to eat, and to this he does not lie. Three square meals a day he eats plates and plates of food from our dorm’s endless buffet. Between meals he has protein smoothies and pop-tarts. His mother frequently ships him care packages of cookies and other baked treats that last mere days. Every evening he goes to the gym with his muscle powder drink that contains 1000 calories alone. Through his workouts and his metabolism, the guy remains a god among men, with no body fat and deltoids that make Brad Pitt look like Pauly Shore.... read more through link
