Man talks in sleep. Wife writes down everything he says. Good times roll.

My fiance in her sleep said:
"They're using rubber ducks to teach abstinence! We have to stop them!"

These are all so hilarious! I only know of one instance that I ever sleep-spoke, and that was when I was eight. I was giving my name and age to a shady character in my dream who I remember to have worn a wide-brimmed hat and a trench cloak.

I have hopes of becoming a writer but, unfortunately, I am both too kind and too serious to make a sarcastic or Deadpool-esque character. This just might give me the kind of spark I need. Thanks so much :)

This is what happens when foreign minds get exposed to american tv...

They only thing i can think of is, what is she feeding him?

weird

I don't know lady it wasn't so good for me. If you really want to share how about U2 in bed on Utube

What's his beef with lentils?

funny shit!!

now when does she sleep if she has time to capture this?
came to mind

Best ever!

ha i thought that was well funny, i talk in my sleep allot iswell

My husband talks in his sleep too my favorite: "Smash, Crash, Supercorn! Stop telling me what to do!"

His wife should consider herself lucky.

"Ooh! My balls are itchy. Have you got the cheese grater?"

"You know, you're not some precious flower. And if you were I'd be a weed and grow next to you and choke you to fucking death!... Love you!"

"I demand compensation in cola bottles. Lots of fizzy cola bottles. In one lump sum."

"Well if I'm the douchebag, you're the contents, Titfuck!"

"Don't take this the wrong way, but you're a fucking retard. Really."

[in a cute, sing-song voice] "Time to bounce your face off the waa-aall."

Sounds like a bi-polar/psychotic adolescent on LSD....

I guess all is well so long as he does not talk about having a girl friend. Other than that I think she should video him and post it online once a week. I would like to see it.

"I've got a badger, a dog, a cat, and a sack. Now that I've got 'em you can fuck off. All mine."

just absolutely made my day!

This was funny, as ive heard people say some funny things before in their sleep and have been told that i've done this too! i wonder what the scientific medical explanation is for this happening and people saying words they usually wouldnt whilst awake

i wanna marry this guy. this much laughter and i won't need to do crunches anymore.

ROFL "Vampire penguins? Zombie guinea pigs? We're done for.... done for."

that is hilarious! haha. he seems to really like food. or dislike food, i guess.... lol

I wonder how much of this stuff he says on purpose just because he knows his wife is listening?

I love a good laugh in the middle of researching all of the bullshit that takes place on this planet!! :D

Thank you English man who only seems to suffer from DID in his sleep. :o)

... He really does not like lentils...

there is nothing sacred any more. this is too funny

I have to say something just so I can refer to this and impress all my friends with this hilarious blog thingy!

my wife talks in her sleep and thank f--k it does not come true or i would be on the street and she would be living in a big f-ing mansion with some buff braindead fucknut,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,the difference is i am the one with a 6 digit bank acount......so f--k her dreams ,,,,if she wants to go ,,,,fine and all i can say is ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,booo boo boo hoo hoo ,,,,,,,,,,,,ok how the f--k is next ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,bring it on...........variety is the spice of life,,,,,,,, by,,,f--k that is the most true statment ever made,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

"Robots making sweets? But they've got no taste buds! Metal smarties."
lol :l

"Awesome. Teddy bears bungie jumping."
Freud would have a blast with this guy

"Now fuck off and let me bask in the glory of being me."

-Sounds like someone was channeling their inner Kanye West.

It's only January but I think this may be the funniest (and most creative) thing of the year!

I love this because my husband talks in his sleep too. One night right after he fell asleep he mumbled, "I do love bunnies, I do." Which made me laugh because he's a huge dude and seems very menacing but actually loves bunnies very much.

that's hilarious!

Too funny!

this is crazy...hahah

"I can't control the kittens. Too many whiskers! Too many whiskers!"
-heh- Read em ALL!