Comedy | August 30, 2011 | 50 comments

Rick Perry: Your call to God is still on hold

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JanforGore
I have a feeling God doesn't want to talk to you Rick Perry, or answer your prayer. Could that be because you are an ignorant closeminded anti-science fool? Or at least, playing one for the cameras for your oily benefactors? Yes, a phony now using all of these conservative talking points to feed your own personal ambitions while your state burns. Nero would be proud of you. I wonder, do you even know how to read a map?

You must know what 'global warming' is. Afterall, you did work as the Texas chairperson for Al Gore's campaign in 1988 when you were playing a Democrat. But even regarding that, you lied and stated he never spoke about global warming then when it was one of the main issues of his platform. I even have a video of him speaking about it on NOVA in 1983... just for the record, that's before 1988. Al Gore has been out here for over thirty years reporting on what REAL scientists are saying Mr. Perry. Not out here spouting fairy tales. And it's those fairy tales you spout that have now led to your state by the looks of it going over a tipping point.

Your economy has lost billions, your agriculture is decimated, your people's livelihoods are being ruined with their futures unknown and biodiversity will suffer for decades. But let's just go out on the campaign trail and tell those same people who are losing it all that even their social security is unconstitutional and you will take that away from them too. Face it Mr. Perry, you are a failure of a leader and pointing the finger and blaming climate scientists for your ignorance isn't going to change that reality one iota. Take a look at the map Mr. Perry and don't wonder why God has your call on hold. Even (he) respects science.
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50 comments // Rick Perry: Your call to God is still on hold

  • Buckeye_Bill
    • 0
      Buckeye_Bill  

    • Rick Perry has appointed Ms. Betty Bowers to head his committee on DOMA.

      If anyone has ANY questions or help in understanding his stance on the subject please contact her!

      }8^)

    • 1 year ago
  • gatormouth
    • 0
      gatormouth  

    • Both Perry and T Baggers serve the corporate interest.

      "Historica­lly, canon law was enforced by the government such as the Inquisitio­n and as such was law. Citizens could not afford to ignore it.

      In most modern societies, church and state have been separated; the government will not enforce canon law and the Church has no privileged voice within in the law-making apparatus of the state."
      http://www.duhaime.org/LegalDictionary/C/CanonLaw.aspx

      Governor Perry is now the self appointed Chief Inquisitor of the State of Texas, and the T Party is not protesting this expansion of oppressive government­? Wait, the T Party is the re-branded "Religious­" Right of old. I suppose a militant Church has always been the handmaid of empire. Mussolini wanted to re-create the Roman Empire, and as he said "Fascism is a religious concept".

    • 1 year ago
  • JanforGore
  • coolplanet
  • JanforGore
  • woltzwurld
  • gypsysailor
  • HarukoHaruhara
  • bike10
  • HarukoHaruhara
  • Buddha2112
    • +1
      Buddha2112  

    • You know, I hate Perry... I hate his bullshit honestly... But we seriously just need to stop giving him attention. Even negative attention is keeping his name out there, and suppressing better choices. I'd vote this up, but I can't stand to see another goddamn article on Perry! FORGET ABOUT HIM and he WILL go away. The Mainstream EATS this shit up; we just need to get away from it... That's why I came to current in the first place... Now it seems I'm here just for the hell of it.

      It's doesn't matter WHAT he says or does, or WHY he says it, or WHEN... We know he's a fuck... So let it go! I try not to waste my time on this crap, but I don't think anyone is saying it.

    • 1 year ago
  • JanforGore
    • +1
      JanforGore  
    • Buddha2112:

      Actually this was a bit of dark humor about the drought and his lack of action on it which is a big deal. It is the drought we need to give attention to since the media is not doing so nor are they telling the truth about the connection to climate change. It is exactly these loudmouths who are constantly trying to plant doubt in people by lying about this that have brought us to this point. So if this is one way to bring attention to it then so be it. I usually don't them give them attention, but when it pertains to the environment I sure will. If you look at the picture with this post it also isn't of him sucking a corndog, it is of a very serious condition we face in this country particularly those states in brown that requires that his dangerous brand of ignorance be countered. He may well one day go away, but climate change WON'T unless we start holding these liars accountable for their deceptions.

    • 1 year ago
  • maasanova
    • -5
      maasanova  

    • Texas is drought prone and it probably has less to do with global warming aka climate change and more to do with it's geographical location. It's not the first one and it won't be the last.

      And I know it's fun to throw a pie in Rick Perry's face for being a global warming promoter before he became a global warming denier, but Perry didn't cause the drought by ceasing to champion Al Gore's global warming propaganda campaign for a global carbon tax. So it's best just to stick to making fun of him for being an Christian pretender and real life version of Yosemite Sam.

      As a matter of fact, this isn't even Rick Perry's first extreme drought. He was Texas Department of Agriculture (TDA) Commissioner during Texas' last major drought back in 1996.

      http://www.tdlr.state.tx.us/weather/summary.htm

      "A Historical Perspective

      No one knows for sure how many droughts have smitten Texas throughout history, but what we do know suggests that droughts have visited often and come with a vengeance. Some of the earliest droughts include

      one in the 15th century along the Canadian River that decimated a native American tribe, an event in 1756 that dried up the San Gabriel River, and an 1822 drought that caused the first crops planted by

      Stephen F. Austin to wither and die. From 1822 through the 20th century, at least one drought has hit some part of Texas each decade.

      In 1958, Robert Lowry of the Texas Board of Water Engineers published a report summarizing drought issues. The report contains detailed information about droughts that have visited Texas since 1891. The study ranked these droughts in terms of the extent to which rainfall was below normal levels. The report suggests that the worst droughts to impact in Texas were: 1) 1954-56; 2) 1916-18; 3) 1909-12; 4) 1901;

      5) 1953; 6) 1933-34; and 7) 1950-52. Quentin Martin of the Lower Colorado River Authority (LCRA) examined tree ring data and hydrologic records to assess drought conditions that have visited Central Texas
      during the past 200 years. His analysis suggests that the drought of the 1950s was likely the worst (in terms of intensity and magnitude) to afflict the region during the study."

      Also, since scientists think that they can control the weather, and obviously they can influence weather to some extent, the TDA will most like implement some kind of cloud seeding initiative if the drough extends much longer than this, just like they did back in 1996.

      http://twri.tamu.edu/newsletters/TexasWaterResources/twr-v22n2.pdf

      "As a result of the drought, many regions of Texas have begun cloud seeding programs, according to the Texas Natural Resource Conservation Commission (TNRCC). In West Texas, a Summer cloud seeding program is now being sponsored by the West Texas Weather Modification Association, while the Colorado River Municipal Water District is operating a cloud seeding program in the South Plains. The High Plains Underground Water Conservation District is considering the feasibility of seeding clouds using groundbased dispensers. Cloud seeding efforts are being considered in the Edwards Aquifer region, and in the Upper and Lower Rio Grande Valley. The Mexican border state of Coahuila will soon launch a cloud seeding effort."

    • 1 year ago
  • JanforGore
    • +3
      JanforGore  
    • maasanova:

      No, he's pretty much a pretender on all fronts which was the point. Like all deniers who don't seem to have an understanding of what these simultaneous current events we are seeing globally in the present entail in regards to global warming trends and global climate and the pace, severity, and longevity of them. We know there have been droughts in the past, it has rained in the past, snowed in the past, etc etc etc etc. on and on. It does not disprove the reality that temperatures are warming, oceans are warming, there is more moisture in the atmosphere, and it is being ramped up by human forcings which is causing these events to be more extreme globally, again simultaneously. I doubt knowing of an isolated drought in the 15th century is going to do anything to help a family suffering now, especially if it continues as long as it is being predicted.

    • 1 year ago
  • unimatrix0
    • +3
      unimatrix0  

    • Just another example of the futility of prayer, and the empty religious superstitions that motivate such desperate, yet profoundly ignorant pleas.

    • 1 year ago
  • JanforGore
    • +4
      JanforGore  
    • unimatrix0:

      Actually it's more like the abuse of it. Some of us understand the way to express ourselves in a spiritual way that doesn't take advantage of a situation for religious or political purposes.

    • 1 year ago
  • HarukoHaruhara
  • OlBlue
    • +2
      OlBlue  

    • TO ALL TO WHOM THESE PRESENTS SHALL COME:

      WHEREAS, the state of Texas is in the midst of an exceptional drought, with some parts of the state receiving no significant rainfall for almost three months, matching rainfall deficit records dating back to the 1930s; and

      WHEREAS, a combination of higher than normal temperatures, low precipitation and low relative humidity has caused an extreme fire danger over most of the State, sparking more than 8,000 wildfires which have cost several lives, engulfed more than 1.8 million acres of land and destroyed almost 400 homes, causing me to issue an ongoing disaster declaration since December of last year; and

      WHEREAS, these dire conditions have caused agricultural crops to fail, lake and reservoir levels to fall and cattle and livestock to struggle under intense stress, imposing a tremendous financial and emotional toll on our land and our people; and

      WHEREAS, throughout our history, both as a state and as individuals, Texans have been strengthened, assured and lifted up through prayer; it seems right and fitting that the people of Texas should join together in prayer to humbly seek an end to this devastating drought and these dangerous wildfires;

      NOW, THEREFORE, I, RICK PERRY, Governor of Texas, under the authority vested in me by the Constitution and Statutes of the State of Texas, do hereby proclaim the three-day period from Friday, April 22, 2011, to Sunday, April 24, 2011, as Days of Prayer for Rain in the State of Texas. I urge Texans of all faiths and traditions to offer prayers on those days for the healing of our land, the rebuilding of our communities and the restoration of our normal way of life.

      IN TESTIMONY WHEREOF, I have hereunto signed my name and have officially caused the Seal of State to be affixed at my Office in the City of Austin, Texas, this the 21st day of April, 2011.

      RICK PERRY
      Governor of Texas

      I hope the drought ends soon but if this fool becomes president, what other Official Prayer Proclamations will he issue?

    • 1 year ago
  • HarukoHaruhara
    • +4
      HarukoHaruhara  

    • My favourite Rick Perry quote: "I don't know how old the Earth is."

      Really? I know. It's somewhere between 4.54 and 4.58 billion years old. How do I know that? I picked up a book.

    • 1 year ago
  • coolplanet
    • +4
      coolplanet  

    • Powerful post!
      As Jesus said, "Don't be like the hypocrites who pray to be heard by men, but rather, pray in secret and God will reward you openly."
      Perhaps if these hypocrites stop publically praying for rain, it will finally rain.

    • 1 year ago
  • OlBlue
  • JanforGore
  • coolplanet
    • +1
      coolplanet  
    • OlBlue:

      Scientists are the first to admit that they don't know exactly what causes it to rain. They know the chemicals required -- tiny molocules evaporated from the ocean and vegetation (primarily algae and trees) but they still can't create a raincloud in the laboratory or in the sky. At best they can seed a cloud already formed with iodine and will sometimes claim to have made it rain.
      An interesting hypothesis is that sound and rhythm are somehow involved.
      If there is a raindance I just hope it's not televised and made into yet another circus!

    • 1 year ago
  • Foxhound606
    • +2
      Foxhound606  

    • Heatwaves, unseasonal weather, storms, hurricanes, droughts...I think it's fair to say even God is giving the message: "Stop F#ng up your atmosphere I gave you, and deal with this shit!"

    • 1 year ago
  • squarethecircle
  • JustZ
    • +1
      JustZ  

    • Candidates in the USA should just keep their opinions (fantasies) about GOD to themselves, instead of pandering to the ignorant masses in sound bites. I'm sick and tired of hearing whether they think daffy duck is more real than bugs bunny.

    • 1 year ago
  • Anonmaly
  • Anonmaly
  • Visionra
  • Anonmaly
    • +3
      Anonmaly  

    • Yeah God has Obama on hold too..... Seems he's not a fan of perpetual wars, not a fan of the ubber-wealthy, not a fan of hypocrisy, deceit, corruption....

      Not a fan of systemically racist drug laws that disproportionately effect black Americans, when white Americans use more drugs.... It's not even prohibition, it's racist class-ism, if you're wealthy you'll buy your way out, and if you're white your 10 times less likely to be caught....

    • 1 year ago
  • DEM46
  • Lisayou
  • remanns
  • remanns
    • +3
      remanns  

    • HAH ! Damn . . . It took Rick Perry, of ALL things,.... to finally awaken Jan's sense of sarcasm, irony,...and black humor !

      Way to GO ! +^d Snark on for JUSTICE and GOOD !

    • 1 year ago
  • JanforGore
  • remanns
  • Schnookums
    • +7
      Schnookums  

    • Texas and its surrounding area do seem to be singled out. Still, I kinda wish it would just rain for them......the last thing I think anyone wants is to start driving Texans out of Texas.......

    • 1 year ago
  • Vic_Romano
  • JanforGore
    • +3
      JanforGore  
    • Schnookums:

      That's because this drought is so exceptional with the word "multi-year" now being mentioned. Australia just a couple of years ago ended a seven year drought with farmers committing suicide.This is actually a serious situation ( the yellow areas showing a likely development of drought) which is why it is imperative that those who constantly bury their heads in the sand or hide behind God need to understand this. I surely do wish for rain, but even a good storm will not be enough to counter all of the damage now. I think a fundamental knowledge of science and the processes of this planet would be a sensible requirement to run for office in this country. One can surely pray for guidance but to simply ignore the role of science here is downright dangerous.

    • 1 year ago
  • SIBob
    • +3
      SIBob  
    • Schnookums:

      That's a good one, ("the last thing I think anyone wants is to start driving Texans out of Texas"). But, then again, many great Blues musicians came from Texas, (most of whom left the state when they made it). I guess Texas gave them the blues. I can understand that.

    • 1 year ago
  • remanns
  • Schnookums
    • +3
      Schnookums  
    • Image
    • JanforGore:

      One has to wonder, though, if it's so exceptional because hurricane prevention and the fundamental knowledge of science processes of the planet are working too well?

      http://ipwatchdog.com/2009/07/13/bill-gates-seeks-patent-on-hurricane-prevention...

      I know there has been a concerted effort over the last few short years to use the existing oil platform infrastructure and retrofitted large shipping vessels in the Gulf to churn cold water (aided by the chemicals now routinely sprayed to disperse oil leaking from the infrastructure).

      Is there self-concerned effort to save repair costs to their infrastructure from powerful storms (as well as their reputations as "oil-leakers" even in the best of weather) screwing the entire Midwestern South bordering the Gulf of Mexico in the name of storm mediation? To wealthy oil companies, is it plausible that they would come to the "lesser of two evils" argument and conclude that saving their investments was worth less rainfall over Texas that depends on moisture from the Gulf to fall over their land every year?

    • 1 year ago
  • JanforGore
    • +2
      JanforGore  
    • Schnookums:

      Another geoengineering scheme that could well be doing more damage if they are being deployed and actually souping up the effects of climate change. Do you know if these patents have been approved? And to answer your last question, absolutely.

    • 1 year ago
  • Schnookums
  • JanforGore
  • Incredulous
    • +1
      Incredulous  
    • JanforGore:

      SCOTUS jan, they have been quietly and profoundly changing the way we read everything in the Constitution for some time now....most of them need to be lined up and shot for treason.

    • 1 year ago
  • JanforGore
  • Vic_Romano
  • JanforGore
    • +3
      JanforGore  
    • Vic_Romano:

      Thanks. I just get tired of those thinking it is all about God to absolve themselves from responsibility for their own actions making a mockery of this very serious crisis. Those of us who are Christians who do not wear it on our sleeves understand as well the role of science in how the Earth works and our effect on it.

    • 1 year ago
  • remanns
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