Obama inspires lawmakers to dream by putting them to sleep
source: http://www.SuperTuesdayNews.com
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WASHINGTON, DC - President Barack Obama delivered his third State of the Union address Tuesday night, allowing exhausted lawmakers and reporters in attendance to catch up on some much needed sleep. Edging out the Jefferson Memorial and nursing home cafeteria talk as the most boring thing happening in the nation's capital, many in the audience collapsed into a deep sleep, including NBC commentators David Gregory and Andrea Mitchell, who were caught off camera sleeping on one another.
"I felt her cold drool splatter on my face and I knew, I knew I should be awake for this but I just couldn’t open my eyes," explained Gregory. "I was having this dream where I almost was flying ...and it was tremendous.”
Mark Buffalo, an out of work NASA employee in attendance came out to see if he’d get his old job back or at least be informed about the private sector taking on space exploration but instead had, “This crazy fucking dream where Herman Cain flew in on a dragon and breathed flames all over senators," he explained. "Terri Schiavo was in it too, but she was, like, both my mom AND my daughter. Falling asleep inside the Capitol gives you some fucked up dreams."
Some of the more visible members of Congress managed to stay awake, though Vice President Joe Biden fell asleep with his eyes open and remained that way until the end of the President's speech. “It’s easy for me to slip in and out of a haze where I can’t hear or see or react at all to people," said Biden. "Hell, I didn't even know I ran for president in '08 until somebody told me!"
For more Election 2012 laughs, visit www.SuperTuesdayNews.com - political satire served up daily!
"I felt her cold drool splatter on my face and I knew, I knew I should be awake for this but I just couldn’t open my eyes," explained Gregory. "I was having this dream where I almost was flying ...and it was tremendous.”
Mark Buffalo, an out of work NASA employee in attendance came out to see if he’d get his old job back or at least be informed about the private sector taking on space exploration but instead had, “This crazy fucking dream where Herman Cain flew in on a dragon and breathed flames all over senators," he explained. "Terri Schiavo was in it too, but she was, like, both my mom AND my daughter. Falling asleep inside the Capitol gives you some fucked up dreams."
Some of the more visible members of Congress managed to stay awake, though Vice President Joe Biden fell asleep with his eyes open and remained that way until the end of the President's speech. “It’s easy for me to slip in and out of a haze where I can’t hear or see or react at all to people," said Biden. "Hell, I didn't even know I ran for president in '08 until somebody told me!"
For more Election 2012 laughs, visit www.SuperTuesdayNews.com - political satire served up daily!
