Christopher Nolan: Superhero Consultant

By now, everyone has cherry picked the sentences of Deadline's report that Christopher Nolan will serve as some sort of amorphous consultant on whatever Warner Brothers will try in a third Superman reboot. The fun terms plucked out include "mentor," "Godfather" and "something of a God" when it comes to Nolan's role on the project. But let's break down exactly what we can expect from this announcement.

Nothing Will Actually Happen

We should clear the air about this right now. Christopher Nolan is fairly ambivalent when it comes to these types of films and was probably more concerned that Batman the character perfectly fit his preferred tone. Compare that to Superman who is flawless, epic and best played with a wink to the camera as Christopher Reeves did. If anything, Nolan may just turn over a sheet of bullet points that say "read the goddamn source material" highlighted in bright red.

Of course, if we're serious here, Nolan's best advice may be finding a director with a strong voice and eye who can handle something on a scale appropriate to the subject. In this case, you need someone who can control the world that Superman inhabits, where Gods, freaks and robots exist and a natural disaster isn't a final boss--it's a six second cutaway.

You'll need a writer who isn't daunted by doing dialog for demigods or galactic evils who don't give speeches, instead they simply blast planets into dust without a second thought. You'll need actors, set designers, gaffers, best boys, caterers, producers, mixers, musicians, etc, etc, etc.

All things that Christopher Nolan won't be doing for the film. He'll be working on the third Batman.  

Don't expect the "Nolan Realism"

Something beloved by comic geeks and religiously debated online when ideas are pitched on message boards about the third Batman film invoke the "Nolan Realism." That is, you won't have Mr. Freeze show up with a legion of hockey players from hell to steal a diamond while telling Batman to chill out.

If Nolan were to do it, Freeze would be a scientist or employee of WayneTech who would be trying to develop cryogenic technology as a cure, yet his research partner Garfield Lynns wants to weaponize it. Or The Riddler would be a fake criminal developed by a splinter group of the Gotham Police Department and consultant Edward Nigma to lure out Batman and go beyond Commissioner Gordon's back.

Basically, Nolan's universe demands a sense of reality to it. No Bat-Nipples, no day-glo paint and no attempts to have anything but gallows humor appear in his Gotham City. That's the world that Batman lives in. Taking the infamous comparison to Superman, and you should make it something fantastic and over-the-top. In fact, the best advice he'll probably have?

Read a comic.  

Batman Begins and The Dark Knight were amalgamations of Batman: The Man Who Falls, Batman: Year One, Batman: The Long Halloween and Batman: Dark Victory. If anything, Nolan does not skimp on the detail or the background when it comes to giving credibility to his characters or his film.

And this'll probably be the first thing he brings up in his role as Grand Poobah. If we're lucky, he'll mention Grant Morrison's All-Star Superman, which shows the Man of Steel at his weakest and most epic moments: Superman is essentially dying because of a burst of solar radiation, but in the process he's becoming stronger and stronger. The 12-issue series is basically a "greatest hits" collection that presents Superman, in all his grandiose legacy, as a character that people could relate to.

But in terms of "modern" iconic tales? You have Alan Moore's "Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow?" that acts as another fan-friendly bash and Joe Kelly's "What's So Funny About Truth, Justice and the American Way" that presents Superman dealing with the "extreme and edgy" heroes that popular a number of other popular titles in comics who mock Superman for not being tougher or dealing with "major issues."

"Executive Producer: Christopher Nolan"

This is the most likely scenario. There is nothing remotely interesting in the concept or character of Superman to Christopher Nolan. Batman is the most interesting comic character to Nolan due to his obsession with duality and split personality. It's long been debated by nerds far greater than I that Superman is Superman and does not ever stop being Superman, even when he throws on a pair of glasses.

He just can't stop. Batman has to be Bruce Wayne and Batman. It's a constant struggle to avoid being swallowed up by either personality and the entire first act of Batman Begins shows Bruce Wayne's progression from a child into a man forcing himself to change. This gets literal in The Dark Knight through the usage of The Joker and Harvey Dent/Two-Face.

In recent years, Superman has been de-powered, re-powered and equalized during the New Krypton arc. I'm sure Nolan will exert some effort on giving his advice. But Warner Brothers has been way too gun shy when dealing with Superman in the past and believes he represents some sort of figurehead after the original film.

He doesn't.

That position currently belongs to Nolan's Batman. And they'll be idiots if they keep trying to reinvent The Man of Steel when more people are interested in Batman.

Then again, we all know what this really means: people want Batman and Superman in a movie. And if Nolan works on a third Batman film and "mentors" this Superman revamp, it'll give him the carte blanche to finally make films he wants to make and ignore the whole comic book universe once and for all. Or, WB will have him make one last film:

Batman and Superman vs. Aliens vs. Predators

Because we all know this is what it boils down to for most film sites.

Special guest appearance by Danny Trejo as Machete, who will ref the fight.

img: Frederick M. Brown /Getty Images