Vampires Suck Manages to Suck Harder Than Twilight
source: http://www.filmfail.com/featured/vampires-suck-sucks/
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Full Story with images... http://www.filmfail.com/featured/vampires-suck-sucks/
Twilight is not the worst vampire movie ever. There, are you happy? Vampires Suck is so terrible, so stupid, so un-funny, that I would rather watch Twilight. Honestly, let’s queue it up on my netflix, I will go toe-to-toe with anyone to prove that Twilight is more entertaining than Vampires Suck.
Fact: All the laughs in Twilight come from horribly awkward dialogue and unintentional sight gags, whereas all the laughs in Vampires Suck are PREVENTED by horribly awkward attempts at humor and heavy-handed sight gags AKA people falling down a lot.
I make fun of Twilight pretty often. In fact, an entire section of this website is devoted to it, but the difference between me making fun of Twilight and them making fun of Twilight is that I try to go beyond saying “oh that’s gay” unlike this fool-ass movie. No one is trying to argue that Twilight isn’t both stupid and homoerotic, but Twilight is so absurd that those things don’t even begin to cover the breadth of hilarity available to a potential spoofer.
For example, how about the disgusting blue filter put over the entire movie? For no reason would Vampires Suck need to cram in as many unrelated pop-culture mentions as it does. Jersey Shore? Alice in Wonderland? Lady Gaga? I know it’s in Friedberg and Seltzer’s nature to do this shit, as they have in every single Scary Movie iteration and spin-off they’ve made in their wretched career, but what in God’s name does Lady Gaga have to do with Twilight? If you’re not going to be funny, at least pretend like you’re trying!
Full Story with images... http://www.filmfail.com/featured/vampires-suck-sucks/
Twilight is not the worst vampire movie ever. There, are you happy? Vampires Suck is so terrible, so stupid, so un-funny, that I would rather watch Twilight. Honestly, let’s queue it up on my netflix, I will go toe-to-toe with anyone to prove that Twilight is more entertaining than Vampires Suck.
Fact: All the laughs in Twilight come from horribly awkward dialogue and unintentional sight gags, whereas all the laughs in Vampires Suck are PREVENTED by horribly awkward attempts at humor and heavy-handed sight gags AKA people falling down a lot.
I make fun of Twilight pretty often. In fact, an entire section of this website is devoted to it, but the difference between me making fun of Twilight and them making fun of Twilight is that I try to go beyond saying “oh that’s gay” unlike this fool-ass movie. No one is trying to argue that Twilight isn’t both stupid and homoerotic, but Twilight is so absurd that those things don’t even begin to cover the breadth of hilarity available to a potential spoofer.
For example, how about the disgusting blue filter put over the entire movie? For no reason would Vampires Suck need to cram in as many unrelated pop-culture mentions as it does. Jersey Shore? Alice in Wonderland? Lady Gaga? I know it’s in Friedberg and Seltzer’s nature to do this shit, as they have in every single Scary Movie iteration and spin-off they’ve made in their wretched career, but what in God’s name does Lady Gaga have to do with Twilight? If you’re not going to be funny, at least pretend like you’re trying!
Full Story with images... http://www.filmfail.com/featured/vampires-suck-sucks/
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- Comedy, Trailer, Movie Reviews, vampires suck
