Green | February 03, 2009 | 24 comments

No such thing as a "good cry?"

source: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/03/health/03mind.html?_r=1&ref=health

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St_Alia_10191
Is crying merely a carry-over from childhood that will never get the same positive results it did when we were young?

"Some researchers say that the common psychological wisdom about crying — crying as a healthy catharsis — is incomplete and misleading. Having a “good cry” can and usually does allow people to recover some mental balance after a loss. But not always and not for everyone, argues a review article in the current issue of the journal Current Directions in Psychological Science. Placing such high expectation on a tearful breakdown most likely sets some people up for emotional confusion afterward.

This call for a more nuanced view of crying stems partly from a critique of previous studies. Over the years, psychologists have confirmed many common observations about crying. It is infectious. Women break down more easily and more often than men, for reasons that are very likely biochemical as well as cultural. And the physical experience mirrors the psychological one: heart rate and breathing peak during the storm and taper off as the sky clears.

When asked about tearful episodes, most people, as expected, insist that the crying allowed them to absorb a blow, to feel better and even to think more clearly about something or someone they had lost.

At least that’s the way they remember it — and that’s the rub, said Jonathan Rottenberg, a psychologist at the University of South Florida and a co-author of the review paper. “A lot of the data supporting the conventional wisdom is based on people thinking back over time,” he said, “and it’s contaminated by people’s beliefs about what crying should do.”"
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24 comments // No such thing as a "good cry?"

  • sheehan1
    • 0
      sheehan1  

    • TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • 2 years ago
  • vivforlovengod27
    • 0
      vivforlovengod27  

    • I cry quite a bit, I think it might be hormones, but I tell you once I've had a good sobby, boogery cry I feel a weight is off my shoulders. Not everyone is a cryer but it has always helped me to cry or discuss my problems when things got overwhelming.
      I do believe there should be other ways to cope with overwhelming issues, any suggestions?

    • 3 years ago
  • Conniepae
    • 0
      Conniepae  

    • Some things in life are worth our tears. The loss of a parent, or some who has touched our life is worth our tears. A genuine sense of sadness when something happens should be normal. We are born with emotion. Healthy emotions aren't all comfort.

      The thought that crying is in question shows how far we have come in personal growth. I hope we don't grow so far, that we stop having real emotions. Many times sharing emotion with someone whom has lost someone, or something, is worth more than money. Emotions and compassion are something, which can't be bought, but it's worth a million.

    • 3 years ago
  • Elligirl
    • 0
      Elligirl  

    • I only cry if I'm already overwhelmed by something and then I get super hungry or tired or somebody stars a fight about something. I barely even cried when my dog died, though. If somebody else is crying, I can't cry at all. I have to suck it up and be the comforter. Weird.

    • 3 years ago
  • tokyo_chic
    • 0
      tokyo_chic  

    • I agreed with this initially. Like whenever I have a breakdown, crying just makes things worse and I end up feeling almost damaged emotionally.

      But, I think there is such a thing as a "good cry"

      Like whenever I watch a sad movie or the like, I cry, feeling an emotional bond and connection to the characters. I think it's good thereapy, and makes me human.

    • 3 years ago
  • SDLN
  • uponrooftops
    • 0
      uponrooftops  

    • I cry randomly, in the car while driving, at the movies, at home watching a movie... Once while I was driving I saw a billboard about puppy mills and cried.. I hate it. It's embarrassing. I don't like getting upset over nothing, and I feel like crap afterwards. Plus then I have to re-do my makeup.

    • 3 years ago
  • cantucwearebrothers
  • jogglef
  • krush_productions
  • iammyfathersson
  • GiantBees
    • 0
      GiantBees  

    • Searched around and found this:

      "Emotional" tears (rather than irritated eye tears) actually contain enkephalin and other hormones. It is also generally believed that crying stimulates the release of endorphins in the bloodstream and thus its evolutionary purpose is to reduce stress. Rockpocket 06:30, 11 March 2007 (UTC)

      Emotion-bound female chiming in to advocate a good cry

    • 3 years ago
  • St_Alia_10191
    • 0
      St_Alia_10191  
    • GiantBees:

      Thanks for the find! Lubricating tears do feel different that emotional tears, very true. My tear ducts actually cramp from time to time, releasing a flood of tears, it hurts really bad too. But other than redness in the eyes and the tears, none of the other effects of crying happen, like runny nose, tightness in the chest, or gulping breaths. Maybe emotional tears are also cathartic because they involve so much of your body.

    • 3 years ago
  • Conniepae
    • 0
      Conniepae  
    • GiantBees:

      Several years ago, one of the morning shows talked about a study which studied the protein in tears. They tested a person who had tears because of an onion and tears produced by emotions. The tears which were generated by emotion contained more protein.

      I feel relief when I can finally cry. When things are happening and I have to maintain a strong facade, I do. But, I must admit, I have a good cry after. Sometimes it just feels so good to cry.

    • 3 years ago
  • ClareW
    • 0
      ClareW  

    • I think it just depends on the person, interesting study though. I'd like to know why people cry in general... leaking from your eyes? it's weird!

    • 3 years ago
  • St_Alia_10191
  • JoeMasaki
    • 0
      JoeMasaki  
    • ClareW:

      It most assuredly is NOT a matter of need. When humanity attempts to deny their body's natural responses or change them we get sick, or mental issues. Crying can be explained by scientists probably, but it's just something we do. Like peeing when our bladder is full, or blinking when something is near our eye. It isn't really able to be controlled (easily), and it takes MAD EFFORT to try.

    • 3 years ago
  • onechance
  • leighbryant
    • 0
      leighbryant  
    • Image

    • i can't vouch for the science behind crying - though i've always felt better afterwards - but i don't know anyone who hasn't watched one of these and felt better afterwards, so there has to be some benefit, no?

    • 3 years ago
  • JoeMasaki
  • St_Alia_10191
  • JoeMasaki
  • St_Alia_10191
    • 0
      St_Alia_10191  

    • I cry about all the wrong things. If something bad happens to me or someone I love, I don't usually cry. But when I'm driving in the car and Taylor Swift's "Love Story" comes on, I just start sobbing. (Before that it was "Unspoken" by Natasha Beddingfield. We had that on rotation at the store where I worked; I'd go hide when it came on!)

      I guess the spontaneous cries like that do feel good, just to flood shit out of my system. But when I cry for real, it just leaves me feeling numb and empty. Makes me think this article has some real merit.

    • 3 years ago
  • abbym0308
    • 0
      abbym0308  

    • I think some people are criers and some people aren't. I never cry, and sometimes I tell myself I need a good cry, but I can't get one out. So maybe I don't need one after all! That makes me feel a lot better...and less cold inside ;o).

    • 3 years ago
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