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Decay Island (Rough Cut)

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Meet Peter Summerville. He works at Treasure Island for the city of San Francisco. Find out about his job, hopes and ideas for the future redevelopment planned in 2012.
matt_fisher

3 responses // Decay Island (Rough Cut)

  • Created as my first pod for the SEP program
    matt_fisher
  • Wow man you've got some beautiful shots in this pod. I really like the Summerville character and I think the Island has a sort of personality of it's own, but I felt like the pod needed to move a little faster. But overall it looked great and it's an interesting story.
    patballosu
  • I think you need to be tighter with your use of his words in this. We dont need to hear all the details, I think we can fill in the gaps. At the top I think you need to get quicker to the lead in terms of "Why do I care about this?" For the first two minutes I was thinking this b-roll is good-looking, but I dont know what this guy is talking about or why I want to hear it. Then at 2:20 when he introduced the idea of being a single landlord for an abandoned island outside San Francisco I did a complete 180 and I was immediately interested. I think you could lead with that clip and the ambiguity as to what hes talking about will only help you. I really think theres a great story here but its not so much the details about Treasure Island its the idea of this beureaucrat who has complete mastery over a decaying island that one day will be a luxury housing complex. The story of that beaureaucrat (fuck thats a hard word to spell) and the island is great, the history of the island and the details of its maintenance is only really an issue if your involved in public policy.

    My other note is that graffiti seemed to take on a huge role in this just by way of b-roll, but it was never mentioned. An interview with some of the denizens of Treasure Island (I imagine homeless people, skateboarders, drug addicts, and graffiti artists) would be great in order to get another dimension on it.
    mfarrell1

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