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When women bring home the bacon

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When your boyfriend or husband is unemployed and you're earning the dough, the relationship could suffer.

Bread, bacon, clams - whatever you call it, women are the ones bringing it home these days.

According to The New York Times over the past year, as companies from Citibank to GM announced massive layoffs, a full 82 percent of the people getting pink slips have been men. Any day now, women are expected to become the majority of the American workforce.

On the one hand, more women being primary money-makers is amazing-a real opportunity for us to get over the way-outdated idea that supporting a family is a man's job. But on the other hand, relationships can suffer when one source of income is lost and power dynamics shift.
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larock
  • added March 02, 2009

71 comments // When women bring home the bacon

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    I don't see there being any reason this would make the relationship different as long as there's mutual respect for what the other person is doing. It's all about balance.

    recommended by current89
    abbym0308
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    Kept-Man for hire! :)

    VTJimO
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    Iit does not matter who works or doesn't as long if the person at home is helping with chores and happiness stays if there is children in the homes same goes there are many times my family was in the same boat it did not matter my husband did everything even cooking so i could rest when i got home so it does not matter who works and who dosen't

    mattdylan
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    if the relationship is good then it should not matter who pays. if not both sides could make it worse for the other.

    morirjedi
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    If you got a girl that gives you slack about being laid off then you need to lay her off.

    2KGS4
  •  

    true that!

    larock
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    I would love nothing more than to see my wife bring home more money than me. I know several relationships that are exactly like that and none of them seem in trouble.

    SW2
    • SW2
    • 8 months ago
  •  

    The 3rd wave of feminism is somewhat unique to the US, that is not at all to say that the US is ahead on gender equality, as you'll find women who are doctors, scientists, techies et al all throughout Europe and no one bats an eye-lid at it. For whatever reason much of the west saw to do without it and/or go about it via different means.

    One thing the 3rd wave of feminism did was to prioritize girls or boys in the class rooms. The belief was that the boys were already ahead so they wouldn't suffer, but the girls needed to gain. There was a massive campaign even to hammer it into girls to go to college etc etc. The boys did indeed suffer, and here we're seeing the results not of advancement and enlightenment, but of putting our boys second.

    I also attribute the crappy attitude and strained relationship that American men and women in generally have towards one another to the '3rd wave'.

    The whirlwind has been reaped. I don't really feel any care or concern over it any more, let the whirlwind pulverize American society and the male-female relationship. The US did sow it after all; it's truly poetic.

    Vikingblood
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    My wife has made a lot more money than me for several years and it has never been a source of strain. The only way this becomes a problem if is the man has some serious self confidence issues.

    DouginLA
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    I must say i read the article solely because of the pic.

    recommended by simplecj, clayjj05
    Lazybones
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    Besides the fact that I'm not 9 months pregnant, I can relate to all of these women and the situation is not pretty. I'm wondering how this is contributing to women actually holding onto upper level jobs with higher salaries. Are the men getting cut because they already make more and it's just cheaper to pay a woman less for performing the same job functions?

    Also, this is an article about woman finally reaching equality in the workforce - can't we PLEASE not mock the issue and have a less offensive photo?

    ajcowley
  •  

    Who makes the "most money" is inconsequential. One major reason being that some choose to steer from high-paying jobs, preferring a job they're happy in over one that pays loads but that they hate. Also one might prefer to devote themselves to the arts, social-working, community service/organizing--without which a society would be rather barren.

    In addition one or the other partner will end up being payed more for their job, simply as they employer(s)/company/whatever happens to give their employees higher salaries.

    The issue isn't if one or the other makes more or less, that's rather petty. The only question is weeding out the natural part from the epidemic. And mens lowered attendance in universities and raising unemployment is an epidemic, a social-problem facing our country. As a man you're not supposed to say any of this, though, you're supposed to be excessively proud, show what a tough-guy you are as it doesn't both you, giving no thought to if it is a social-ill or part of a social-injustice; one of many negatives drilled into men, as surely as the negative notions drilled into women. Unless you're a particularly intimidating guy it is difficult to get away with throwing off the social-shackles and not put up having to project the pretense of being a proud, tough-guy dumb-ass.

    "Har, har, I'm facing a form of reverse discrimination but I'm too tough to care." It isn't tough, it's bullheaded idiocy.

    This is a valid issue based on valid, human-emotions and solid-grounds. If either partner, man or women is without employment due to no choice of their own, they will begin to feel a sense of having no purpose or sometimes power, and begin resenting the partner who does have a purpose especially if the unemployment is, or is seen as unjust by said person.

    It seems many do not see the flood coming, or refuse to acknowledge it until they're drowning. A flood is coming, an economic as well as social one. We've solved our problems by creating others.

    Vikingblood
  •  

    qq

    flyingkick
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    one reason for this phenomonon is due to the inequality in pay between men and women. If you are a mega-corp and want to cut your labor costs, why keep a bunch of over-paid men around when you can get the same job done by a woman for less money.

    unclematt
  •  
    Image...

    How funny...I just wrote a note on my facebook about this the other day! I have recently observed that among my friends and coworkers women are becoming the bread winners while men are being laid off. Its interesting to see that this is more widespread.

    Whats neat is that in all the couples I know where the women now make more or all of the money, the fact that the men are laid off is a non issue. Its not about being on some power trip, its about banding together to ride out this economic storm. The only thing Ive noticed is that some of the men are uncomfortable relying on the women...but I dont think thats necessarily a specific male trait but a personality one...Ive always felt uncomfortable having to lean on my partner for financial support. Ive dont it when absolutely necessary but I prefer to be financially stable on my own.

    My boyfriend was laid off a few months ago and although he has started up a production house that is already gaining several significant clients, Ive picked up purchasing extra food and paying for indulgences (eating out, shows, etc) because I can afford to so I dont mind doing it...when we first started dating I was making less so he paid for a lot of our entertainment. Ive also let him know that if things go bad I will fully support him that way he can keep pursing his career goals instead of taking a step back and working at McDonalds.

    seanalyn
  •  

    As a vegetarian, I don't partake in bacon. Check out the online ad about the beauty and ill of meat.

    The ad appeals to many aspects of my conscious and subconscious attention. What impresses me most is at peta.org, they have a follow up piece called, "Reasons to become a vegetarian." Together are cogently showcased the beauty and ill of eating meat.
    http://mythandhope.blogspot.com/2009/01/veggie-love-petas-banned-super-bowl-ad.h...

    dbmurti
  •  

    I don't think women will ever be the majority of workers in the U.S. Although, If my wife could make as much money as I make and let me stay home I would be cool with that.

    The chick in the pic has a great ass.

    Ihatethemall
  •  

    I dont know Im mixed.

    Society is ever changing, maybe it is our time to finally knock down the walls that seperate the genders.

    At the same time I dont know whether we are emotionally/mentally ready to make the change.

    Men are still full of male pride, though this is changing slowly, we still arent to the point where men accept women in every facet of male activity like say playing in the NFL.

    Women are just as bad, feminism has been taken too radically I know women who think that men are nothing important to society that women are a godsend,they honestly belive that men play no important part in procreation. Yes women do most of the work, however the human race would end if men disappeared. Likewise if woman disappeared, our differences as two genders are important for our survival.

    I think that The distinct differences in men and women shouldnt be forgotten and unfortunately we are changing so fast that these differences are being ignored and forgotten and I dont think that will be good for our society.

    blaino
  •  

    Some women are selfish, when you dont have money oh boy thats it you are finish, but oh no they want equal rights in everything of the relationship .
    As soon as you lose your job bye sucker ...next,thats what I have to say about some women in America.
    Some women are takers they are not givers its me,me,me only me you selfish biatch.
    Its better to be alone than to have the company of a selfish biatch.
    Thats all I have to say.
    Thank you.

    Tayllerand
  •  

    Nice picture I lke her , I love her ,Ill marry her ,I will eat her.

    Tayllerand
  •  

    i don't think society's approach to women will change. during WWII the only people left to work in the U.S. were women. but as soon as the war was over, the women went straight from the factories and back to the kitchens. did society recognize women as capable an equal then? nope.

    hanna878
  •  

    i have been laid off for about a year now...my wife makes the money and i stay at home with the kids...its different but it works...money isnt a issue much as (sounds corny) our love seems to solve any and all problems...she loves her job (hair stylist) and so do i:-) btw i'm 22 and we've been 2getha for 6 yrs...so money will never be a issue for us when it comes to us loving eachother.

    iamfree
  •  

    My wife pays the bills while I go to school. At first it felt funny, now we're perfectly comfortable with it. We have pretty much decided that I'm going to be the stay home dad when we have a kid. To be honest, I'm that kind of person.

    The real issue here is, women tend to make less money than men -therefore they are not going to be the first ones let go during a financial crisis, you have to wonder what this really means. Is it really a step towards evening the playing field, or are women simply being taken advantage of?

    mistaj
  •  

    if i ever get married , it's gonna be to a woman who can make actual bacon - starting with a pig and culminating in me having some on a plate - that's what i'm talkin bout .

    malathion
  •  

    HOW COME NO ONE HAS SERIOUSLY QUESTIONED WHY THERE IS A WOMAN'S ASS ON THIS ARTICLE?? An article concerning feminism, prefaced by a (probably Photoshopped) ass, and no one says anything?!
    YOU GUYS ARE IDIOTS.

    youguysareidiots
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