Third of family break-up children lose contact with fathers in ‘failing’ court system

i understand fully i just dont care
if the hand of god himself tried to prevent me from parenting my child i would fight.
i dont yield to governmental policy when it comes to my family

You obviously have no clue on how the family court system works......

aside from restraining orders the courts dont take away your ability to be a father.
take my home my car my paycheck and every last nuance of dignity it has no bearing on my choices and actions.if my wife takes my kids to canada it will be my lifes work to go where they are. they may not live under my roof but ill be where they are to the ends of the earth.if i have to parent from a cardboard box in the nieghborhood where my wife moved my kids so be it but ill be damned if any piece of paper keeps me from fullfilling my responsability to my children

And what happens when the court decides you ar not able to care for your child, but only useful as a paycheck to the mother?? Would you be OK with never being able to see your child because their mother lied to the courts and they made a ruling based on her words only?? What if you had evidence to prove she lied and they still rule in her favor?? Do you realize how often the courts ignore the interests of the children in order to gain financially from federal funding via SS Title IV funding??

the courts werent asked when people decide to get married
nor are the courts consulted when we decide to procreate
so why are the massive errors on the part of our citizens the responsability in any way of the courts
the fact that people lack the basic civility to part without third party intervention is self evident of where blame lies.
if a court decides custody belongs to my wife you bet your ass ill be following her all over green earth to make sure i can fullfill my responsibility to my child

It is truly tragic what we are allowing our family court systems and child protective services to do our fathers. Hopefully passing healthcare for everyone could turn the tide on this problem. Parents could be given the services they need to overcome all the objections of the case workers and they won't be so quick to steam roll the children into adoption and permanent foster care placement. Parents deserve an honest chance to deal with the "experts" accusations and receive the psychological help they need to be considered fit to be parents. These services and these trends of separating children from their fathers and their mothers, too, have been because of deep funding cuts in most states and in the Federal system, too. They just don't have the funds to provide the psychological services. Parents are saddled with having to come up with money to pay for required programs for treatment for drug addictions or anger management, etc.

Health care for all would cover these vital services and the parents could stand a better chance in family court.

But on another note, the family courts are in need of serious reform starting with the standard of evidence. It needs to be reasonable doubt to protect the family unit.

children are the end result of of a break up of a family its a sad fact that the children are always the ones who lose in the end.

Monkey_Films, you bring great points to light. I find a lot of unhealthy competition, hate and anger between people. I find disturbing hearing and observing situations where "perfect mother" acts violent towards her children, husbands and for the rest of the neighbors will appear as kind, loving, caring mother and wife. Women are vindictive but too often convince others of just the opposite and act as victims instead. They often blame everyone including their spouse, parents, and their children for her unfulfilled dreams of "the perfect family".

It's sad what our current ways have done to the family, marriage, children and relationships. Even if you're a feminist, we need to teach women to marry for love, not money. We need to teach our girls to be less vindictive, even after a breakup. Hate and vindictiveness turn even the most beautiful woman into an ugly beast. Sick, mentally unstable, screwed up by television and society, these women destroy their children and partner/former partner. We can continue to love after we love. Let's bring love back. The hippies had some good points.

Not thats not good at all !

This is so true - I know several fathers who don't see their children because they got behind on child support - they got behind in child support because they either got laid off or got a job paying less, but didn't have the money to hire an attorney to change the amount of support they were required to pay over to the mother - once behind, it's like a snowball of debt - then they can't get a regular job b/c their entire paycheck will be garnished to pay penalties, etc. - stuck with crappy job and no relationship with their kids

Wonderful news,this has never happened to me but a couple of my friends can't say the same. Just by being their friends I can empathize the pain and anguish they feel being torn to pieces in court only to have their family broken up, leaving them with emotional and mental scars for the rest of their lives whether hidden or obvious.
This is something our court and social systems should be fixing, not increasing.

Finally this is being talked about. Having been through my parents divorce I can not agree with your comments enough.

This system has failed us.

Shameful!

Only a third? I believe it is much higher then that.

Only 11% of mothers value their husband's input when it comes to handling problems with their kids. Teachers & doctors rated 45%, and close friends & relatives rated 16%

77% of non-custodial fathers are NOT able to "visit" their children, as ordered by the court, as a result of "visitation interference" perpetuated by the custodial parent. In other words, non-compliance with court ordered visitation is three times the problem of non-compliance with court ordered child support and impacts the children of divorce even more

In recent years, we have seen many women plan on being a single mom and they are applauded for this. We even had a single mother give birth to eight infants and no one seems to care that there will be no father in their lives.

We also see many sources that even question if fathers are actually needed (other then for being a wallet)

http://shatterdmen.com/Irresponsible%20fathers.htm

.This is the very fiber that holds us together, family. The unit must be maintained. We need to go back to teaching individual responsibility. If everyone is personally responsible there will be better, more mature decisions made regarding relationships. Raising a child properly is not an easy job. It takes two responsible adults. Kids NEED direction from home.
Kids should be taught to consider the results of an action BEFORE it is done and if they are ready to accept the responsibility of those actions.
The family unit must be a strong representation.
beginning in the home and in grade school we must reinforce the importance of responsible decisions.
How do you fix that which is broken now? Structured situations which encourage children and fathers to bond and grow in a healthy environment. Give them "time" to be together in a community situation working together doing something both can benefit from individually and together. Make these part of the settlement for both parents to agree on.Maybe learning a new sport or planting a community garden, something that gives both self worth and a bonding experience.
We throw enough tax money at these departments surely someone can find places and people to do these things for the benefitof ouryoung and old a like.

tommic, sometimes this poison (called "parental alienation") is so strong that the children never come to know the other parent (yes it happens regardless of gender..)

As a product of a divorce back when it was not the norm, 1961 I can tell you not much has changed. Parents mothers inparticularly because the win custody so much tend to lie about the father who is no longer there to defend himself. Children are easy to manipulate. Not many kids who get seperated from their fathers keep in touch so they belive what they were told. Its not until kids finally get to talk to both sides to they finally understand the dynamics of why two people couldn't make it work. Its amazing how young teenagers can sort through the lies and the truths between two parents. Then the kids can find peace. But in the end everyone loses.

After so many decades of evidence, this is finally coming to light..... I am pleased this information is breaking ground as it will benefit the children.... Kudos to the many who have fought for this realization to hit the mainstream in these past decades. At last your hard work has not fallen on deaf ears....