Hard News 04/02/10
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Today we cover all the best pranks from April fools day. Also, go watch the trailer for Insanely Twisted Shadow Planet! THIS is Hard News “On these high seas, no one can hear you scream.”
Sega announced today that one of their most beloved characters is returning from the deep. A post on the official Sega America Blog revealed that a sequel to Ecco: Water Wars is currently in the works. Confident of the title’s success, Sega is already bragging that the game is “so good, we didn’t even need a first one.”
Water Wars 2 sees the return of Ecco the Dolphin, who has mastered the art of time travel and weapons of mass destruction. Now the leader in a movement against humanity, the First Porpoise Shooter will see Ecco break free of his circus-like confines, steal human technology, and use it against them. Even against the elderly.
“You know, my mom told me that dolphins are like… like… some of the smartest creatures in the seas,” said Ecco fan x_X_x_SUPERMEGAECCOFAN1991_x_X_x on the SEGA forums. “Who says Dolphins can’t be smart enough to take human technology, improve it tenfold, and then use it against us in an epic fight for freedom? I know I can’t.”
Multiplayer action promises play with up to eighteen-and-a-half dolphin friends. Sega has remained quiet about gameplay modes, other than detailing that one will encourage you to shoot rockets at unsuspecting fishing vessels and cruise ships.
We have to admit that the drastic change in direction for the franchise has us a bit leery. However, this could be just what Ecco needs to vault himself back to stardom. We will be sure to share our impressions when given the opportunity for hands-on play.
The galaxy is filled with every sort of riffraff, refuse and space trash imaginable. For thousands of years the brave souls who answer to the name Sarlacc have made sure it doesn’t pile up. As deadly as they are misunderstood, these determined individuals are the ultimate authorities on final judgment in the galaxy. A new definition of pain is waiting for anyone who would dare cross one.
Contrary to popular belief, a Sarlacc is much more than an extreme omnivore – a misconception the cunning Sarlacc have been exploiting for thousands of years. Frequently, a Sarlacc will act as a mercenary-for-hire, contracting their services – and their tentacles – to underground groups needing extra muscle. Occasionally, one will pose as a trophy pet of an egotistical Hutt gangster, capitalizing on the perfect disguise as they zero in on their targets.
But the Sarlacc aren’t just opportunistic scavengers waiting for a free lunch; they are paragons of patience and planning, always waiting for the right moment to pounce on their quarry – even if it takes one thousand years. A Sarlacc has no trouble keeping their sights on a target that has long since forgotten them. Revenge is a dish best served cold, and no one serves this dish better than a Sarlacc.
Professional Courtesies
Most Sarlacc have learned more about the galaxy than most other professionals could hope to learn in ten human lifetimes. Not only has an average Sarlacc done everything under the double suns, many techniques that are synonymous with other professionals were innovated and perfected by a cunning, resourceful Sarlacc.
Every Smuggler knows that one dropped shipment could lose him respect – and a year’s worth of credits, but only the insane would search for contraband cleverly stashed in the belly of a Sarlacc. Imperial Agents breaking the will of interrogated prisoners rely heavily on techniques handed down to them by the Sarlacc – who are known to telepathically torture information out of their most reticent victims. Jedi Knights train for years to master The Way of the Sarlacc, Shii-Cho Lightsaber form as the foundation of their amazing combat prowess. Consulars of the Jedi Order spend long hours meditating on Sarlacc to develop the dissonant serenity that keeps them calm in the midst of chaos. Bounty Hunters – a Sarlacc delicacy – have perhaps benefitted most from developing contacts in the Sarlacc Underground; it is here that hunting and trapping are brought to new heights and Bounty Hunters learn to become great, or die. No team would have the skills it needs to survive its mission without the practice and invention of a dedicated Sarlacc.
And Finally The Best April Fools Jokes were All about Halo A new Video Was Release by Bungie Showing Off The new Game Mode We All been Waiting For Its Chess! And Man Its The Longest Running Multiplayer Game in The World By a Member Of The Bungie Team Chess is What They Did on April Fools They were Howerver Done By the Halo Movie. Tesing A Hollywood Movie Feturing Master Chef IGN.com Show Us The Trailer Feturing Some Teenage Actor and The War Between the Humans Master Chef Really Got Some Moves.
I Hope you Enjoy It THIS is Hard News
Sega announced today that one of their most beloved characters is returning from the deep. A post on the official Sega America Blog revealed that a sequel to Ecco: Water Wars is currently in the works. Confident of the title’s success, Sega is already bragging that the game is “so good, we didn’t even need a first one.”
Water Wars 2 sees the return of Ecco the Dolphin, who has mastered the art of time travel and weapons of mass destruction. Now the leader in a movement against humanity, the First Porpoise Shooter will see Ecco break free of his circus-like confines, steal human technology, and use it against them. Even against the elderly.
“You know, my mom told me that dolphins are like… like… some of the smartest creatures in the seas,” said Ecco fan x_X_x_SUPERMEGAECCOFAN1991_x_X_x on the SEGA forums. “Who says Dolphins can’t be smart enough to take human technology, improve it tenfold, and then use it against us in an epic fight for freedom? I know I can’t.”
Multiplayer action promises play with up to eighteen-and-a-half dolphin friends. Sega has remained quiet about gameplay modes, other than detailing that one will encourage you to shoot rockets at unsuspecting fishing vessels and cruise ships.
We have to admit that the drastic change in direction for the franchise has us a bit leery. However, this could be just what Ecco needs to vault himself back to stardom. We will be sure to share our impressions when given the opportunity for hands-on play.
The galaxy is filled with every sort of riffraff, refuse and space trash imaginable. For thousands of years the brave souls who answer to the name Sarlacc have made sure it doesn’t pile up. As deadly as they are misunderstood, these determined individuals are the ultimate authorities on final judgment in the galaxy. A new definition of pain is waiting for anyone who would dare cross one.
Contrary to popular belief, a Sarlacc is much more than an extreme omnivore – a misconception the cunning Sarlacc have been exploiting for thousands of years. Frequently, a Sarlacc will act as a mercenary-for-hire, contracting their services – and their tentacles – to underground groups needing extra muscle. Occasionally, one will pose as a trophy pet of an egotistical Hutt gangster, capitalizing on the perfect disguise as they zero in on their targets.
But the Sarlacc aren’t just opportunistic scavengers waiting for a free lunch; they are paragons of patience and planning, always waiting for the right moment to pounce on their quarry – even if it takes one thousand years. A Sarlacc has no trouble keeping their sights on a target that has long since forgotten them. Revenge is a dish best served cold, and no one serves this dish better than a Sarlacc.
Professional Courtesies
Most Sarlacc have learned more about the galaxy than most other professionals could hope to learn in ten human lifetimes. Not only has an average Sarlacc done everything under the double suns, many techniques that are synonymous with other professionals were innovated and perfected by a cunning, resourceful Sarlacc.
Every Smuggler knows that one dropped shipment could lose him respect – and a year’s worth of credits, but only the insane would search for contraband cleverly stashed in the belly of a Sarlacc. Imperial Agents breaking the will of interrogated prisoners rely heavily on techniques handed down to them by the Sarlacc – who are known to telepathically torture information out of their most reticent victims. Jedi Knights train for years to master The Way of the Sarlacc, Shii-Cho Lightsaber form as the foundation of their amazing combat prowess. Consulars of the Jedi Order spend long hours meditating on Sarlacc to develop the dissonant serenity that keeps them calm in the midst of chaos. Bounty Hunters – a Sarlacc delicacy – have perhaps benefitted most from developing contacts in the Sarlacc Underground; it is here that hunting and trapping are brought to new heights and Bounty Hunters learn to become great, or die. No team would have the skills it needs to survive its mission without the practice and invention of a dedicated Sarlacc.
And Finally The Best April Fools Jokes were All about Halo A new Video Was Release by Bungie Showing Off The new Game Mode We All been Waiting For Its Chess! And Man Its The Longest Running Multiplayer Game in The World By a Member Of The Bungie Team Chess is What They Did on April Fools They were Howerver Done By the Halo Movie. Tesing A Hollywood Movie Feturing Master Chef IGN.com Show Us The Trailer Feturing Some Teenage Actor and The War Between the Humans Master Chef Really Got Some Moves.
I Hope you Enjoy It THIS is Hard News
