Comedy Central // Current

Cold Day In Hell: Fox News' Sean Hannity Apologizes To Jon Stewart

Fox News' Sean Hannity responded to Jon Stewart Wednesday evening after the Daily Show... more

atomiclegion
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4 days ago
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63 comments

Onion Sports Network heading for TV... as a pilot for Comedy Central

The fake sports station, The Onion Sports Network, is gearing up for its TV debut, as... more

smurph25
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5 days ago
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4 comments

Is Dick going soft? We must know!

Is Dick cheney and his blubbering nonsense going soft? Let's find out, why don't we!!

KSirys
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11 days ago
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6 comments

Josh Lieb author video, featuring Jon Stewart

Josh Lieb was born and raised in Columbia, South Carolina. After graduating from... more

copperdragon
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1 month ago
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Many a True Word...

It is said many a true word is spoken in jest. In this case it's spoken in bitting... more

eldamon
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1 month ago
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Obama Speechwriter Reveals SHOCKING 1st Draft of Lecture to Students

THE WHITE HOUSE
Prepared Remarks of President Barack Obama
1st Draft - Back to School Event
Arlington, Virginia
August 8, 2009

President:
“Now I’ve given a lot of speeches about education. And I’ve just talked and talked and talked until nobody’s really listening anymore, and the only audience I’ve got left is you little kids. It’s called “overexposure.”

I’ve talked about taking power away from our 57 states and making a Federal Curriculum and have the federal government be in charge of teaching you, or what we call, indoctrinating (that’s a big word) – indoctrinating you into our socialist way of thinking. We’re bypassing your parents this way.

But at the end of the day, if we can make your school like the largest 50 high schools in urban areas, we’ll have graduation rates less than 50 percent. Remember 50/50 - and all that because of government intervention.

No matter what you want to do with your life – I guarantee that you’ll need an education to do it. You want to be a doctor, or a teacher, or advance as a fireman? You’ve got to work for it and train for it and learn for it. And in the end, you’ll be denied the fireman’s promotion.

You’ll need the knowledge and problem-solving skills that come from biased curriculum that teaches you how terrible Christopher Columbus was for invading America and bringing all the white European culture over here. You can talk all day long about our nation being more fair and more free, but in the end – all you really want is power. Power. There’s nothing like it. Now children – to be a dictator - just ask my buddies Hugo Chavez, Ahmadinejad, and the Castro boys. You just have to work hard and some day you can grow up and be like me and run your own country, too. There were times when I was lonely and felt like I didn’t fit in. Now I’m the MAN – cool, eh?

Now, if you forget everything else I’ve said, today, just remember to wash your hands a lot, and stay home from school as much as possible, even if you have to pretend you’re sick. So finally, I want to ask you, what’s your contribution going to be? How are you going to serve your president, and will you make enough money in the future to pay off the debt I’m passing on to you? You’d all better have very good jobs to pay off trillions and trillions of dollars.

So thank you, so thank you, and God bless me – your president, President Barack Hussein Obama.”

(NOTE: if you know who I am ... please keep it a secret. Shhhhhhhhhhh)THE WHITE HOUSE Prepared Remarks of President Barack Obama 1st Draft - Back to... more

NewWarriorMan
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2 months ago
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Mitzi TV (promo video)

Hello, and welcome to Mitzi TV. I'm Mitzi Szereto, author, blogger, expat, and overall... more

MitziTV
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3 months ago
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3 comments

"Knees Up Mother Brown"

Mitzi TV goes for a right old knees-up at a proper authentic English "local", The Duke... more

MitziTV
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3 months ago
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2 Clips -- Patton Oswalt on Caprica as Talk Host? Why Not on Earth as Talk Host?

Please let life imitate art. Also has info on Patton's new movie Big Fan and a... more

IAmATVJunkie
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3 months ago
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1 comment

"Reno! 911" Canceled!

The hilarious improv show “Reno!911″ won’t be returning next season to Comedy... more

adrienneanderson
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3 months ago
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1 comment

"Baby You Can Drive My Car"

Mitzi TV heads to the Connaught Village Spring Festival in London, encountering some... more

MitziTV
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4 months ago
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3 comments

Reno 911! is no more...

After six seasons, Comedy Central has axed the spoof police show "Reno 911!"... more

smurph25
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3 months ago
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1 comment

TGIF: 'Alien,' 'Pirates' and 'Futurama' news updates, oh my!

Talk about wrapping up a busy work week in Hollywood. A horror classic gets a prequel,... more

MediaJor
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4 months ago
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Arianna Huffington Faces Off Against Stephen Colbert

Arianna appeared on "The Colbert Report" last night to discuss the re-issue of her... more

atomiclegion
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4 months ago
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1 comment

Bender Comments on Futurama Recasting

July 24, 2009 - Futurama fans have been understandably less than pleased (to say the least) since news broke that the entire voice cast may be replaced for the upcoming return of the series, as new episodes go into production for Comedy Central. Today at Comic-Con, I managed to speak to one of those beloved voice actors, John DiMaggio, who plays the integral role of Bender.

While casting notices have gone out for new actors to play the roles, certainly all Futurama fans still hope that the salary disputes between the cast and the studio can be resolved and DiMaggio, while reluctant to say too much, did hint that there could be reason for optimism.

When I asked him what he could say about the situation, DiMaggio first broke into song, singing some famous Elvis Presley lyrics: "Caught in a trap. I can't walk out! Cause I love you too much, baby!" He then smiled and told me, "In other words, no comment. I really can't talk about it. All I can say is that Matt [Groening] and David [X. Cohen] have such a wonderful project and I love it dearly – love it to death. And hopefully we'll be able to work it out. And I think we will. It's just going to take a little time and that's about it."

I mentioned to DiMaggio how tremendous the fan support has been for the actors since the story broke and DiMaggio nodded, saying, "Yeah, the fans have been really wonderful and that's really great. But you know, that's just the way it goes. That's just the way this show business works. And we'll see what happens. Hopefully… I have a good feeling it's going to turn out for the best. That's about it. That's all I've got. That's all I have to say about that!"

Interestingly, the Comic-Con listing for Futurama's panel tomorrow (Saturday) still lists DiMaggio as taking part, along with Billy West, Katey Sagal and Maurice LaMarche - though it's unclear whether this is simply because no one has been told to update it, or if it could mean they will still be taking part. This panel has become a very notable one now, given the current situation and how upset fans are by what has been going on. Check back tomorrow on IGN TV to see our report from the Futurama panel.July 24, 2009 - Futurama fans have been understandably less than pleased (to say the... more