Washington // Current TV

Congress Strikes Back: Gives Taxpayers a 4% Approval Rating

Washington -- Still stinging from the lowly 10% approval rating it received from the American public, Congress has taken revenge, bestowing a measly four percent approval rating on taxpaying citizens.

“Taxpayers are doing a terrible job of providing the House and the Senate with the resources we need to run America correctly,” said one prominent Senator who asked to remain anonymous. “You ask us: ‘where are the jobs?’ We’re asking you: ‘where is the cash?’ ”

The Senator went on to deny the public’s charge that Congress can’t get together to accomplish anything worthwhile. “Right here is an issue 96% of all Senators and Representatives agree upon. Only 4% of my colleagues believe American taxpayers are holding up their end of the bargain.”

A long-term Representative, who asked to remain anonymous, said that American taxpayers are not working as hard as they should because they are being “distracted by the details of democracy.

“They need to let their Congressmen and Senators take care of such things as liberty, justice and freedom. Most of us are lawyers so we know how to work around those issues. Just send us the money and we will make everything okey-dokey.”

Another Representative, who asked to remain anonymous, began weeping when questioned about the record low approval rating Congress received this month.

“Sticks and stones can break my bones, but those low approval numbers give me a bad case of the blues. So I’m glad my colleagues had the courage to turn the tables. You suck, taxpayers.”

Building on the anti-taxpayer momentum, one Senate leader, who asked to remain anonymous, has drafted a bill “that would make corporations more like people, so they can make up for the increasing number of taxpaying slackers.

“My bill proposes that we give all corporations friendly nicknames, like Fred and Bob. Buy them a cake on their birthdays. Take them out for lunch, even when there’s no special occasion. And if some insider stock information is discussed, there’s nothing wrong with good friends shooting the breeze.”

Also included in the proposed law is a motion that would sell the naming rights to several Washington landmarks. Reportedly, a deal already has been cut with a major bank, renaming Congress’ home “The Capital One Capitol.”

“What’s in your Constitution?“ the Senator asked.Washington -- Still stinging from the lowly 10% approval rating it received from the... more

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Sarah Palin trashes National Endowment for the Arts

March 16, 2011 | 2:58 pm
Television commentator and half-term Alaska governor Sarah Palin trashed the National Endowment for the Arts recently, describing the agency as "frivolous" in a Thursday interview on a Fox News talk show. [http://www.foxnews.com/on-air/hannity/transcript/sarah-palin-talks-wisconsin-union-battle-julianne-moore-playing-her-hbo-movie#ixzz1GnICRkVo]
"NPR, National Endowment for the Arts, National Endowment for the Humanities, all those kind of frivolous things that government shouldn't be in the business of funding with tax dollars -- those should all be on the chopping block as we talk about the $14-trillion debt that we're going to hand to our kids and our grandkids," Palin told right-wing host Sean Hannity. "Yes, those are the type of things that for more than one reason need to be cut."
Palin did not elaborate on what the other reasons might be for chopping the NEA budget. But the government of every major civilization in world history has also prominently funded the arts.
The comment about the NEA came during a discussion of the ailing U.S. economy. Palin is certainly conversant with frivolous activity, but her grasp of the economy is weak.
Debt reduction would barely be affected by penciling out the small federal arts agency, which currently operates on a $161-million annual budget. Palin's support of a federal subsidy for the notorious "bridge to nowhere" in her state became a campaign issue when she ran for vice president on the 2008 Republican ticket. That local project carried a price tag of $223 million.
"Reality is we have 15 million Americans who are out of work," said Palin. Nationally, the nonprofit arts and culture industry supports 5.7 million jobs and generates $166.2 billion in annual economic activity, according to Americans for the Arts. [http://www.artsusa.org/information_services/research/services/economic_impact/default.asp] The NEA is one linchpin in that sizable economy.
In the interview Palin made no statement advocating similar budget cuts to her home state as she recommended for the NEA, which is also in the cross hairs of Washington's Republican leadership. Palin's Alaska gets $1.84 in federal spending for every dollar its citizens pay in federal taxes. [http://articles.nydailynews.com/2010-11-14/news/27081146_1_alaska-snooki-reality]March 16, 2011 | 2:58 pm Television commentator and half-term Alaska governor Sarah... more

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