Jerks // Current TV

Men's health magazine just printed the top ten ways to tell your girlfriend she's fat. Below are five. You know what? Usually, for me, its the other way around and I don't worry about it.

From Jezebel.com:

"Isn't it a total drag, bro, when the woman you supposedly love gains weight? Instead of perhaps considering that she's aware of the issue, or perhaps wondering if there are health concerns or emotional reasons behind a sudden weight gain, Ask Men thinks you should approach the subject of your beloved's body by humiliating her as often as possible. Isn't that just the sweetest thing, girlfriends?! It's like Irving pushing Cathy into a shark-infested ocean and yelling, "This will help you prepare for swimsuit season next summer, as I know how emotionally difficult it is for you!" Charming.

Below, a break down of Ask Men's Top Ten "Subtle" ways to fat-shame your girlfriend into losing weight:

No.1 - Take her to places where she has to wear a swimsuit
If she seems content staying at home eating donuts in her track pants, why not start taking her to places where she has no choice but to where a swimsuit? As she awkwardly looks around at all the slender bodies having a great time, she'll more than likely vow to do something about her recent weight gain, especially if she knows she'll be back there in the not-so-distant future.

No.2 - Leave "now" and "then" photos lying around
This is a highly effective way to draw attention to the explicit changes to her body as you see them. By consistently reminding her of how she used to look, she'll inevitably be more inclined to do something about her excess flab. Appropriately chosen and strategically placed photos should accomplish this quite nicely. Keep in mind, if she confronts you about trying to shame her into losing weight, the key approach here is denial, as you reply: "Do you actually think I would be that manipulative?" Of course you would, but she doesn't need to know that.

No.3 - Sabotage her chair
Sometimes as men we have to get downright nefarious to get what we want. You might not be proud of stooping to this level, but nothing says "better lose some weight" like a broken chair. After you loosen a few screws or remove some important slats of a chair in which you know she'll sit and subsequently break, sit back and watch the guaranteed dietary transformation that ensues. It will profoundly amaze you.

No.4 - Ask her to wear an old dress
Plan a romantic night out for the two of you and insist that she wears something from when you first got together; particularly something that you know doesn't fit her anymore. This way she'll have to admit to you that she's put on too much weight and can no longer get into many of her old clothes. Follow it up by telling her how good she looked in those days, and maybe she'll make it her mission to get back to that size.

No.5 - Playfully grab her love handles
Ask any man and he'll tell you that he instinctively flexes his biceps whenever a woman touches them. The same thing goes for a woman when you make contact with any unwanted flab: She recoils and feels embarrassment. Use this reaction to your advantage. Even if she thinks that you're too busy at work to have noticed a few extra pounds, if you continually rest your hand on her love handles (or even lightly pinch them), she'll soon realize that you're becoming increasingly aware of something that never used to be there before."Men's health magazine just printed the top ten ways to tell your girlfriend... more

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Who cares about you bikini line? Arthur Kade does!

This is making its rounds on the Internets. I'm not really sure who this guy is, but I know he has an opinion about my personal habits. You know how I know? Because on ArthurKade.com, he has shared his opinion about women and their grooming habits....

"One of my biggest pet peeves is a girl who is not probably groomed on all parts of her body. If you are a hot girl, then it is imperative that everything is shaved, or clean to the point that there is minimal hair. I have had many experiences with beautiful women where they have been amazing looking (especially Internationally), but upon further investigation they are not properly groomed, and I have actually stopped in the middle of the act. One of the many things I notice on a girl while talking to them, and figuring out whether I am going to have them is their: nails, hair, make-up, and skin, and this will many times separate girls who are hot (8’s and 9’s) from girls who I want to take it to the next level with that night (10’s). I remember once going home with a girl from Bungalow 8 in NYC who was a 10, and when I saw her naked and ungroomed, I became so disgusted that I asked her to leave my apartment, and when she said “What’s wrong?” I told her, “I am not into the hair thing”. She told me she hadn’t been with anyone in 2 months, and wasn’t planning on anything that night, so I decided to let her stay over. That next weekend when we hung out she was totally shaved. The reason I started thinking about this is because today while at the doctor getting my blood work taken for my blood sugar and next month of Accutane, the woman taking my blood at Quest Diagnostics had a visible mustache. I actually felt uncomfortable having her take my blood because of this, and I contemplated mentioning to her that I wanted a new nurse. I just don’t understand how in today’s age, a person, regardless of socio-economic conditions, can not make sure that they are properly groomed."

This guy's blogs are being picked up everywhere, mainly because they are all blatantly narcissistic and hilariously unreflexive. It's always nice to know that women are still held up to Victoria Secret model standards. Why don't I just airbrush my nipples off while I'm at it?

Also, he has a tag line of "Arthur Kade: My journey to stardom". Hahaha!This is making its rounds on the Internets. I'm not really sure who this guy is,... more

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