tagged w/ Queer Eye for the Straight Guy
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David Fagin is a musician, he's written this great guest post. Enjoy!
An Unknown Rockstar- (A Scary “Horror-Blog” in time for Halloween)
I’ve been playing music “professionally” for just about twenty years now. I put the word “professionally” in quotes because, unlike most jobs –in which the transition from amateur to professional is defined as the point at which you actually begin to make money -as a musician, I believe you’re a professional the moment you decide to quit your job and move in with your girlfriend; because, money or no money, that’s the point you begin to work at it full-time.
If we’re going strictly on the “money” scale, then I guess you could say I turned professional about a month ago. See, over the years, even though I did countless things that made me appear “professional,” such as, appearing on the Howard Stern Show w/ Gene Simmons, playing shows w/ The Strokes, No Doubt, Duran Duran, Stone Temple Pilots, etc., appearing on Carson Daly five times, Dennis Miller three times, having my image digitally re-created for Playboy’s first video game, partnering w/ Napster, testifying on Capitol Hill alongside Alanis Morissette, (breath), speaking at Harvard, touring England, and getting my music featured on shows like Dawson’s Creek, Party of Five, Joan of Arcadia, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, The Real World, and the Today Show, believe it or not, I’ve barely broken even. Scary, right? My mom thinks so, but that’s not the scary part.
A few weeks ago I learned my song, Birds of a Feather, was selected as the theme to the new Jenna Elfman sitcom, Accidentally on Purpose, on CBS. It’s great money and I’m finally a professional! Now here comes the scary part. The theme song is only five seconds long! Horrifying, right? Eat a steady diet of Ramen Noodles for twenty years to get your music out there and when you finally do, it’s practically subliminal (Actually, we ate sushi but Cup o’ Soup sounds better). Am I telling you this because, as a Jew, I feel like whining about the fact that I’m getting paid good money each week for doing nothing? You betcha. But, that’s not the real reason. I’m telling you this because I’m trying to frighten those of you -the ones with the home studios whose friends tell you you’re good but who really think you’re incredibly mediocre –you who are thinking about quitting your job at Starbucks and moving in with your girlfriend and pursuing a career in music, into thinking again.
It’s taken me almost twenty-years of crappy clubs and crappier groupies to get a whopping five seconds to the masses, so, if I can scare just one of you wannabe’s into not taking up a slot in a club that could possibly be filled by a qualified, talented musician, I’d consider this time well spent. My only regret is that this didn’t reach Chad Kroeger in time.
Getting back to me, am I broke? Not anymore. Am I famous? Mmm, guess not. But, hey, at least you know who I am. And, whether you do it by accident or on purpose, don’t forget to watch the show! Boo!
Follow David on Twitter.com/nikchapman.David Fagin is a musician, he's written this great guest post. Enjoy!
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It's a well-known fact that when you need help fast, a gay guy magically appears to make everything better. Bryan Safi explains this supernatural phenomenon in this week's That's Gay.
That's Gay is a recurring segment on the weekly television show infoMania. In each episode of That's Gay, Bryan Safi explores gay issues and stereotypes as they are portrayed by the clueless media. For more Bryan visit http://current.com/groups/thats-gay/ and Current TV.
infoMania is a half-hour satirical news show that airs on Current TV. The show puts a comedic spin on the 24-hour chaos and information overload brought about by the constant bombardment of the media. Hosted by Conor Knighton and co-starring Brett Erlich, Sarah Haskins, Ben Hoffman, Bryan Safi and Sergio Cilli, the show airs on Thursdays at 10 pm Eastern and Pacific Times and can be found online at http://current.com/infomania/ or on Current TV. And make sure to check out our facebook profile for special features at http://infomaniafacebook.com.It's a well-known fact that when you need help fast, a gay guy magically appears... more
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